Last week, while coming back from a domestic flight, I met a gentleman on the AirTrain from JFK Airport to Jamaica Station. He looked at me and said, “What a day!”
I looked at him and replied, “You’re right. What a day!”
He then asked me where I was coming from, to which I replied, “North Carolina.” I asked him back, “Where are you coming from?”
He said, “Beijing, China.”
So far, this was a regular conversation, until I looked at him—he only had one shopping bag with him from a Chinese duty-free store. I asked, “Where is your luggage?”
He told me, “This bag is everything I need.” I felt so envious because I am the worst traveler, in terms of exceeding weight limits when I fly.
Once I got off the AirTrain, I could not stop thinking how only one shopping bag could represent the “essential.” I then made a weird association with REBT, asking myself, “What is essential for people in REBT?” Let’s suppose that you are going to fly to Beijing tomorrow and someone tells you to take what you perceive as “essential” in REBT to put in your luggage. What would you take?
Pick the answer that represents you:
| Identify the A | I cannot leave JFK without being able to identify what is going on around me. |
| Identify the B | I cannot leave JFK without being able to identify my irrational beliefs. I MUST know my demands. |
| Identify the C | I cannot leave JFK without being able to identify my emotional responses. I am so emotional that I always need to stay in touch with how I feel. |
| Identify the D | I cannot leave JFK without knowing how to dispute my IBs in a timely manner. Knowing D makes me feel comfortable. |
| Identify the B–C connection | I cannot leave JFK without being able to identify my IBs and how they make me feel. I always think about the B–C connection, and it is reassuring to know that I can make that connection. |
| Identify the ABC | I cannot leave JFK without being able to have guidelines for myself, in terms of ABC. These three letters are going to save my life. |
| Identify the ABCDEF | I cannot leave JFK without having clear guidelines for myself, in terms of ABCDEF. I love these letters, from the beginning to the end, and I feel calm knowing that I can utilize them when I want. |
What am I trying to say? REBT does not provide a fixed and unchangeable way of looking at things. Its flexible nature allows you to take what is helpful with you and what you think best matches your needs. Some people need to take just the A with them, while others need the ABC.
Just take what is helpful and USE it by continuing to practice and go to Beijing on a regular basis. I am sure that you will learn what is essential for you in REBT after a few trips.
See you at JFK…
May a ticket to Beijing be with us!
