by Rosina Pzena, M.S.
Over the past week or so, I found myself beginning the exciting yet overwhelming task of car shopping. Shopping is fun for most of us when we are “just looking”- window shopping, trying on clothes for fun, test driving a convertible, etc. However, when salespeople start to put pressure on us to make a purchase, that’s when we can feel a variety of unhealthy negative emotions – such as anxiety, which is what I felt at the car dealerships. With my knowledge of REBT, I’ve realized that salespeople try to sell us “shoulds” and “musts” – you SHOULD take this car home today! You MUST buy before the sale runs out! If we buy into these irrational beliefs, then we can be pressured into making a purchase that we may not necessarily need, or are not ready for financially.
During this process, I kept trying to remind myself of rational preferences rather than demands. It would be nice if I had a car with a sun roof, but I don’t absolutely have to have one. I’d prefer to take advantage of end-of-year deals but if I don’t, I’ll survive knowing I wasn’t pushed into anything I wasn’t ready for. This rational outlook helped me from disturbing myself, which could have impaired my judgment and led me to make an impulsive decision. And in fact, because I said I was not committing to anything that day, I received a better offer from one dealership later that week!
