by William Taboas, M.A.
In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it is always easier to postpone obligations instead of attending to them as soon as they come by. We often use the excuse of “I’ll get around to it, eventually”, “I can do it later”, “I will have more time tomorrow”, etc. Yet, for some of us (and I would say most of us), it is easier to put things off than to take a moment to complete a menial task. Why is that?
The short, one-word answer is: comfort. Dr. Albert Ellis was very astute in integrating philosophical, biological, and historical reasons for procrastinating. Humans don’t like to get out of their comfort zone. Humans tend to have the nutty notion that in order to maintain emotional homeostasis is by avoiding discomfort, despite the adverse consequences of avoidance (short-term relief, at the cost of long-term gains). As a species, we hold on to silly and irrational notions that tasks should be easy and done with immediately, we overestimate the discomfort the task will bring, we tend to underestimate our ability to cope with momentary discomfort, and as a result, we self denigrate. Avoidance perpetuates this cycle and reinforces these irrational beliefs.
How do we break the cycle? First, let’s ask some questions to reflect on. Ask yourself: What’s in it for me to delay the gratification to procrastinate; versus, what’s in it for me to collude with my procrastination? What are my goals and values in life? What small step, infinitesimal even, am I taking to pursue those goals and values?
Then, problem solve. Evaluate what you are doing to pursue those goals and values. Evaluate your goal-distracting self-talk that lead to procrastination. Then come up with goal-directing self talk that encourages you. Develop beliefs that will increase your tolerance to discomfort. Evaluate if they are effective ways to reach and practice them and determine if you have realistic expectations of how the process will go. Follow through by adjust your methods and expectations if they are not optimal.
Then take a steps; small steps. To break a habit, you will have to start somewhere. Focus on one thing at a time. Focus on the moment. The paralysis of procrastination is typically accompanied by an overwhelming sensation that everything needs to be done, and the irrational belief that it needs to be done immediately or at once. You can make the choice of going there, or staying here; with the task.
Finally, be consistent with your steps, and think of it as a domino effect. Once you get one domino to topple, the rest tend to follow. Have other dominos set in place to keep the momentum going. Dr. Ellis, and other of his contemporaries, such as Dr. Albert Bandura, believed in the power of increasing the sense of self-efficacy in order to increase healthy living. So remember to reward yourself for your efforts, both big and small. Effective skills and healthy habits don’t develop overnight. After all, Rome wasn’t built in a day…
