Category Archives: rebt-cbt-post

You like “to-may-to” and I like “to-mah-to” You like “ir-ratio-nal” and I like “ra-tion-al”

Ennio Ammendola, M.A.

I have heard this word game endlessly but I never knew what it meant…so I decided to figure it out. Here is the official answer: “This quote is from a song called Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zZ3fjQa5Hls]”

What happens when we utilize this quote with REBT? There can be four categories of clients based on this original quote:

1) Those who say: It is “to-may-to” and there is no “to-mah-to”
2) Those who say: It is “to-mah-to” and there is no “to-may-to”
3) Those who say: It is neither “to-mah-to” or “to-may-to”
4) Those who say: It is either “to-mah-to” or “to-may-to”

Are you lost???… Read more...

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Discomfort Intolerance

Kristen Tobias, M.A.

This blog is the third of four that will expound on the types of frustration intolerance (FI) discussed in my previous entry, Not All Frustrations are Created Equal.

Your life will expand, remain status quo, or shrink largely based on your willingness to stand discomfort. This assertion encapsulates an REBT term, discomfort intolerance, which refers to a personal philosophy that life not be too hard. Individuals who were prone to this thinking endorsed statements such as “I can’t stand doing things that involve a lot of hassle,” “I can’t stand having to persist at unpleasant tasks,” and “I can’t stand doing tasks when I’m not in the mood,” on the Frustration Discomfort Scale.… Read more...

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Blog Block

Jennifer Shindman, M.S.

When I learned that I would be writing a blog as part of my externship at the Albert Ellis Institute, I almost immediately felt very anxious. Then, when I learned that the topic of each blog was my choice, I became even more anxious; I have freer reign to mess up! To avoid the discomfort of feeling anxious, I avoided sitting down to write this blog.

Then I started to think about what I was doing, and how much this behavior (avoiding writing because of my anxious feelings) was going to hurt me in the long run.… Read more...

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Effective Complaining

William R. Taboas, M.A.

We all complain. Grumbling, criticizing and whining are all common behaviors we engage in on our day to day activities. But do you ever wonder if you complain too much? Has anyone said that you’re a total bummer, or maybe that you’re way too critical or judgmental? Are people avoiding you or tuning out when you complain? Is it getting in the way of school or work? More importantly: Is complaining getting in the way of you carrying on the things that you need to do?… Read more...

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USA

Shannon O’Neill, MA

Let me begin by asking you a question: What would it take for you to consider yourself successful?

-A prestigious career?
-A sizable bank account?
-A thinner figure?

Although individually defined, the pressure for success can take over one’s life and often define self-worth. We have all seen the articles and many of us have fallen victim to them – 7 unique ways to attain success or 5 habits that the super successful do before 5 a.m.… Read more...

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The Practice of REBT Equals the Practice of REBT

Ennio Ammendola, M.A.

Three years ago, I started taking professional drum lessons with the expectations (better framed as illusions) that I was going to become a good drummer with just one hour a week of practice.

This illusion went on for quite some time until I realized that I was not improving, and so I was ready to quit my lessons. One day, I was talking to my teacher Matt, and I told him that I felt I was not improving and I was getting frustrated to the point that I was seriously considering not going to his lessons.… Read more...

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Emotional Intolerance

Kristen Tobias, M.A.

This blog is the second of four that will expound on the types of frustration intolerance (FI) discussed in my previous entry, Not All Frustrations are Created Equal.

Emotional intolerance is a dimension of FI that encompasses the perceived inability to withstand emotional distress. Pick your poison…anger, anxiety, depression, jealousy, shame, or another distressing emotion, and couple it with the idea that you cannot bear it and must be free of it yesterday.… Read more...

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The Dangers of Comparison

Magda Murawska, M.Ed.

I hope that I am not alone what I recall the following scenario – Sitting at a table with friends, I listen to them discuss their accounts of job promotions and various exciting life experiences. Happy and proud of my friends’ accomplishments, I find myself comparing my own life to theirs. It’s almost an involuntary act, one that has been honed with years of practice. My comparison begins in the calm waters of commonalities, but quickly veers into the more dangerous high tide of comparisons, as I began to negatively compare what’s lacking in my life based on what is present in theirs.… Read more...

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Predicting the Present

Brooke Guttenberg, M.S.

At one time or another we have all tried to predict the future. We may picture ourselves five years down the road and wonder where we will end up. Usually, the most interesting part of that game is when those five years is up and we look back and wonder how we ended up where we are now. As many of us have experienced, life is never a straight path and whether or not we end up where we predicted, the path to getting there is almost always unpredictable.… Read more...

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Entitlitis

Kristen Tobias, M.A.

This blog is one of four that will expound on the types of frustration intolerance (FI) discussed in my last entry, Not All Frustrations are Created Equal.

Entitlitis is a word that has insidiously slipped into American vernacular. It refers to a condition afflicting a cohort that, in HIPPA fashion, will remain unidentified (although to be fair, entitlitis is sure to be found across all cohorts). This condition consists of a life philosophy whereby individuals believe that the world and others owe them something, as well as the idea that life should be fair.… Read more...

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