by Kristene A. Doyle, Ph.D.
It’s almost 9 pm as I sit at my computer this evening. I am writing from a hotel room in Honduras, here to conduct a training on behalf of the Albert Ellis Institute. I am doing my best to answer some emails before I call it a night (this is called living it up when one goes to another country), and I happened to glance down at the lower right-hand corner of the computer screen. I notice the date, August 30, 2o12, and I am immediately struck with a sense of disbelief. Tomorrow, August 31, will mark the 21st anniversary of my father’s death (odd terminology to say anniversary connoting something positive). I’m sure everyone reading this has a similar date that stands out for them in their mind; something that no matter what, is indelible. I can recall to this day the sense of utter despair and gut wrenching emotion that took over me like a tsunami when I was told my father was killed in a car accident. I recall viscerally the sense that I would never, ever, ever be the same, and my life as I knew it was changed forever. All of that was true, and has proven to be true to this very day. But I was wrong about one thing. I believed at the time that my life would never go on, how could it? I lost the most important person in my life, and there would be no purpose in anything I did or that happened. Today, and many days prior and hopefully many days ahead, have proven otherwise. I never could have predicted I would turn out the way I did, or could have ever found happiness again, nonetheless be in some foreign country doing what I love to do, teach REBT to individuals from all different backgrounds. Perhaps it is partly because of what I have experienced that I am able to go to so many countries alone without doubt or insecurity. For all of our Facebook followers- bad things are going to happen. That’s a part of life that many times is out of our control. I will forever be indebted to Dr. Albert Ellis for empowering me to not let these bad things get the best of me. I hope you can do the same. Perhaps Nietzsche was onto something when he said “That which does not kill us makes us stronger.” With all due respect to Nietzsche, I would just add one thing to this- that which does not kill us makes us stronger- if we choose so.