By Kristen Tobias, M.A.
Of procrastination, Albert Ellis noted:
…you foolishly delay, you put it off and again and again. Why? Because you (stupidly) think, “I’ll do it later.” It will be better and easier if I do it later. Or you think (idiotically!) “I have to do it perfectly or else I’m a no good, and inadequate person! So I’ll do it later.”
The opportunities for procrastinating behaviors are endless. Laundry, cleaning, calling someone, emailing someone, work-related tasks, starting a new hobby, and on and on, we can procrastinate almost anything in our lives (why do today what you can put off until tomorrow). But for now, I’d like to focus on one type of procrastination. Procrastination that involves putting off something specific that needs to get done in a specified timeframe and is relatively important.
Procrastination often comes in predictable stages. First, consciously or unconsciously, individuals can experience a number of irrational beliefs that deter them from starting the project. This initial phase might include the demand “I must do it perfectly!” If I say this, there will always be a reason for me not to start, such as” I have not optimally slept and therefore am not in the right state to start a project that must be done perfectly,” “I don’t have ALL the materials so I cannot start on any PART of this project,” and on and on. To boot, the anxiety I will feel when I tell myself that something must be perfect can be crippling. One can also think, “I cannot stand to do this project, it will be too hard!” The anxiety produced by these beliefs makes me put off the project. Or, can repeatedly reappear during the completion of the project.
The next stage of procrastination entails a sense of relief. In the moment when I decide not to start the project, I feel better. This part is particularly pernicious, because I have just received a powerful reinforcement for not starting the project. And so I go about my day, I can even be productive in other ways, and congratulate myself for getting so much done (despite the fact that I have not touched the important thing that needs to get done)! This cycle of anxiety-procrastinate-relief can become hard to break.
The next stage that creeps in consists of self-condemnation: “I am so awful that I did not start this project yet! I am a failure! What is wrong with me?” Then, we can easily be back to experiencing unhealthy negative emotions, especially more anxiety and guilt. With all of the aforementioned irrational beliefs, the project might not be completed, even in the face of deleterious consequences.
Procrastination can be combated with an army of rational beliefs. “The project does not have to be perfect, and that is okay. There is no perfect time to start a project. The project might be hard, but I can stand it. I can tolerate the hardship and discomfort, and it is highly worth it to do so. If I fail at this project, it does not mean that I am a failure.” The longer I have been procrastinating, the more effort it will take to change my beliefs, in other words, to think more logically and flexibly about something that has become shrouded in irrationality.
It likely will take some self-reflection to understand the irrational beliefs that hold you back from important goals. Are you in a stage of procrastination? What rational beliefs can you practice to get unstuck?