by Shannon O’Neill, M.A.
If you are a frequent flyer, it is safe to say you have become familiar with the safety demonstrations that are reviewed before departure. Somewhere between fastening one’s seatbelt and powering down electronic devices, the oxygen mask is discussed.
“…Please place the mask over your own mouth and nose before assisting others.”
Similar to airline guidelines, it is recommended that we all make ourselves a priority before attempting to support others. I hear it from professors all the time, “Make sure to take time for YOU this weekend and engage in self-care.” This is easier said than done. As a graduate student, I often wonder if the word “no” is even in my repertoire. I am the first to admit that I take on too many tasks, believing I can manage all that is expected of me. However, as Paulo Coelho once stated, “When you say ‘yes’ to others, make sure you are not saying ‘no’ to yourself.”
Everyone has a limited amount of resources that are continuously being afforded throughout the day. Whether it is your significant other, child, co-worker, or client, others are constantly taking from your resource pool. By the end of the day, your battery pack is low and it is time to recharge. Aside from the basic needs for survival (sleep, food, water), the only way to replenish these resources is through engaging in personal activities that are unique to you and your happiness.
Self-care may be a hard concept to grasp, as many consider it a selfish act. But in reality, self-care is another tool that needs to be utilized in order to better assist others. It is natural to want to provide for those you love, but remember that putting yourself first is the first step in doing so.
“It is not selfish to refill your own cup so that you can pour into others. It’s not just a luxury, it’s essential.”
