by Elissa Habinsky, M.A., M.S.
I moved…again. Just a few weeks ago, I moved for the second time in less than one year. It was not a move that I anticipated making, but rather one that was due to extenuating circumstances. In any event, moving for many people is often an overwhelming and stressful endeavor. However, being able to learn from the mistakes I made with my first move, resulted in a much more successful and less anxiety-provoking second move.
Moreover, during the weeks leading up to my first move, I was anxious. I told myself things such as “packing is too much”, “I can’t handle this”, and “moving is awful”, among other irrational beliefs. As a result, I avoided constructing boxes, and packing which was exactly what I needed to do in order to appropriately prepare for my imminent move. My irrational beliefs lead to my anxiety, which ultimately caused me to avoid the tasks I needed to complete. I let myself get in my own way.
What helped me more successfully manage my second move was the sheer fact that I had recently moved. Drawing upon a past experience where I was able to withstand a difficult situation provided me with great comfort. Instead of repeating the same irrational beliefs as I did before my first move, I told myself, “you moved before” and “it wasn’t fun, but you got through it”. “It may be challenging, but certainly not awful.” These thoughts, although not overly optimistic or positive allowed me to behave more functionally. I was able to get a head start on packing, and I was able to pack a little at a time rather than wait until the very last minute. To be clear, I was not completely void of concern. I experienced a healthy level of concern which did not impair my functioning but instead motivated me to organize my move effectively.
Using past experiences to help oneself manage current or future events is not exclusive to moving. This strategy can be used for many other situations. I found it particularly valuable, and hope you will too.
