by Johna Hansen, L.C.S.W.
School begins soon for my children and they appear excited to see old friends and make new ones. However, I noticed myself becoming anxious about the amount of things I need do for them before the first day of school. When I saw that the amount of school supplies doubled since last year, one kid needs a whole new set of uniforms, both kids’ shoes are worn out, and their hair needs a trim, I started to tell myself “I “must” get this all done before the first day of school, otherwise I will be seen as “that” mom, the “bad” mom” and I “can’t stand” to be a “bad” mom. While there are many things to do before my children go back to school, I would rather not be anxious while preparing for their first day.
Thankfully, as REBT suggests, by using rational statements instead of irrational beliefs, I can feel concerned and not anxious. Repeating the statements, “I prefer to get all of this done before the first day of school, but there is no reason I absolutely MUST” and “Who I am as a mom does not depend only on whether or not I accomplish these tasks by the first day of school” will help change my anxiety to concern. Also, “If I am unable to accomplish all of these tasks, I will be able to stand that I did not finish them by the first day of school” will help me. And here’s the bonus- by repeating these statements, I might even accomplish more tasks and enjoy more time with my children during the last few days they have left at home before school starts!
