by Joseph Castrogiovanni, M.S., MHC-LP
Research paper due next week? Ugh, I totally forgot. I haven’t even started collecting articles. It needs to be how many pages?! An annotated bibliography too?! This is going to take me forever. I’m sure everyone else can finish this paper in no time. It must not take me so long to get this assignment done, and because it will I’m stupid. I’m feeling anxious just thinking about it. This is too much for me to deal with right now, I’ll just do it tomorrow.
Ahh yes, good old procrastination. The stream of thoughts above provides a snapshot of my experience while working on papers in undergraduate and graduate school. However, it is not uncommon for anxiety and procrastination to pop up while working on almost any assignment that is important to me. In fact I had similar thoughts before writing the words you are currently reading. Fortunately, there was much less procrastination this time. This is because I learned how to talk back to my unhelpful beliefs, replace them with helpful ones, and move from unhealthy anxiety to healthy concern.
For me, the first step away from anxiety and toward concern was to debate one of my beliefs: “It must not take me so long to get this assignment done, and because it will I’m stupid.”. Previous experience has shown me that it can, and often will, take me quite some time to complete my work. Just because I really want to complete it faster, does not mean that I must. Furthermore, demanding that I not take so long is not helping me reach my goal of procrastinating less. I would prefer to complete my work faster for several reasons. For example, I would be more productive and have more free time; but unfortunately, there is no reason I must not take so long. The amount of time I take to do a specific behavior does not determine who I am as a person. People are too complex to be defined in such a reductive way. Therefore, it does not logically follow that I am an entirely stupid person. It only means that I am human and fallible.
In realizing this, I was able to adopt new, helpful, beliefs. Specifically, I replaced my demand with greater flexibility: “I wish I did not take so long to complete assignments, but there is no reason I must not.”; and my self-deprecation with greater self-acceptance: “If it does take me a long time, it does not mean that I am a stupid person. I am a fallible human regardless of how fast I complete an assignment.”. By vigorously reinforcing my helpful beliefs, I am able to feel healthy concern instead of overwhelming anxiety. Consequently, the anxiety is no longer too much for me to deal with and assignments do not wait until tomorrow.
What aspects of your life are you putting on hold because of anxiety? How would your life be improved if you were able to feel healthy concern instead of unhealthy anxiety? What is stopping you from reaching that goal? Will you let your unhelpful beliefs keep you from starting today?